Hold on and Be strong...

Life can be a wonderful thing, but it can always come back around to bite you in the ass!

I just had the best 3 weeks ever! I met someone online, we saw each other 2 days later and we kinda took off from there. He was somewhat reserved because of his past, but I didn't mind, I planned on having fun while it lasted. But my heart decided something else, apparently she doesn't know the words, take it slow! So she jumped in, let herself go and dragged me along. As I said, these were the best three weeks I've ever had, but we dived in too fast, especially me.

So when you suddenly get the text saying 'we need to talk', you know what day it is. And as soon as I read those words, all the butterflies died and dropped in my stomach. I could literally feel it! I don't have to draw a picture but I kind off broke down... That's my problem, I'm all or nothing...

So I went over to talk, and yeah, I think you can kind off guess it. It was just bad timing you know... Too soon after the previous relationship and all that. I don't blame him, not even one bit!!
Okay, true, my heart is still hurting, but we're still talking, we're still friends. And I'm happy with that! I've lost enough people as it is...

So if you go trough this, just know it does get better! I know it's cheesy, but it's true.
And talk to people, that'll help as well.

Lots of love!

The year goes fast!

Oh wow, So much has happened already and I have written nothing about it!!
So announcement time, I will write some updates, but they deserve more than one little post.

Multiple things have happened or are happening and I will write about them separately.
So hold on because the first update will be coming soon!!!!

Lots Of Love!

New year, new me.

First of all: happy new year everyone!!!! May your 2017 be magical!

So I know it's sappy with the new year, new me stuff... But I'm really going to try!
First of all, I'm battling my depression, and there is already improvement with my mental health! That's the hardest thing I'm planning on beating this year! And with all the love from my friends, it will be possible!

But you know, healthy mind, healthy body! And that's my second battle, I'm overweight, but I'm also working on it. I'm starting yoga this year, and I'm also going to work out more. I'm going to an weightconsultant and she helps a lot!

And as my third point, I got my inspiration from a post today. Ride more, worry less. I am going to ride Farah more, and also Babette is going to be trained in April.

So I am planning to make my 2017 a magical, wonderfull and hopefull year filled with love and friendship!!! I can only wish you as much!!!!

Lots of Love!

Disciplines

So I ride multiple disciplines, I think most riders do. But well I thought I'd enlighten you about the disciplines I ride and how and when I started them.

First of, when I started riding at the age of four, I obviously started with dressage. After a couple of years they'd threw in some jumps in the arena and so I started juming. I never took jumping lessons, I learned from riding the worst jumper you can imagine! Slide stop half a meter before the jump, and then jump over it! After a while I was the only one who could jump him properly!

Then western riding came into the picture. I love western! Also no lessons, my previous stepdad had about 6 horses, all trained western, so we had no choice but to adapt.
So when we left, we still had Farah, we sent her to a western training stable. The first year I only rode western, I still had to get used to her, but after a while I started putting on an english saddle. I still rode her in the western style she was thought, but I would do 'dressage' with her.

When she was used to the different types of disciplines, I thought her to jump! She loves it, but she'll never be a prize jumper and I don't care! As long I can be flexible with her!
Sometimes I 'race' her, like you horse people know, Quarter Horses are FAST! And she is as well, so I sometimes will open her up and let her fly! That feeling is amazing!! You really have the feeling that you're flying!!

Now I'm taking lessons to ride a cart, since I'll teach my Shetland to be a carriagehorse/pony. It is hard tough! There are multiple ways to lengthen the reins, or to go left or right!

And I know Natural Horsemanship isn't a discipline, I still practice it! I think it is really helpfull and more people should learn this, or even knwo what it is!!
And trailriding is also a nice way to do something different for once!!

So that is everything for now, I really want to learn more disciplines and ways to understand and help my horses!

Lots of Love

Worst week of my life...

This will not be horse related!

So Monday while I was driving to school, my dad called me... My grandma passed away that morning... I had to pull over, not being able to continue, I just started crying... Not just crying, I was falling apart. I never thought she would go that soon! She would be 88 next month, alright that is a nice age, but you never want them to go...
So my dad picked me up at school and we went to see her, she was so peaceful, almost sleeping... But me, my sister, my brother and my dad, we all fell apart... She meant a lot to us! We are a very close family, so the pain is even bigger... I didn't want to leave, that would make it official, like she was really gone...
The days went by in a haze, having a headache, tummy aches and so on... Crying everyday, I never knew a human could cry so much...

And today, it was her funeral...
I didn't want this day to come, it would be the last time she would be 'with' us... First we did the greeting, so someone was talking about how she left us and so on, I couldn't keep it dry, not at all...
And then my dad spoke some words, and then it was my turn. Normally the lady that works there would do it, but change of plans. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do, everyone said I did great, but it was still difficult! I am the youngest grandchild, so it was kind of special that I read something.

After a couple of hours, she was cremated and the ashes were to be spread. It was the final part of the day, but it made it more difficult because the strong woman I knew, was just an urn full of ashes... It's so final, you know? You know at that moment it's all real, you can't say she's in her room or she'll great you when you come in... No, she's gone, and it's final, or more denying...

So yeah, she's gone, I'm going to miss her a lot! But she is back with my grandpa, probably nagging at him! But she will be remembered as the strong, independent but small woman she was!
She would always say: "You 'stinkers'*, you'll give me green hair instead of gray!"
Forever in our hearts!

*'stinkers' is a dutch word, but if I translate it, it would lose his power...

School.

So in less than two weeks I myself have to go back to school...
Not that I mind it, I kind off miss it. Only downside, new school aka college.
I don't know anybody, but what I do know already is that I'm going to like the lessons.
I'm going to study animalcare, but I also see a lot of information about the grasses, the ground, soil and so on!

To those already back in school, good luck!

Lots of Love!

Blisters and shit...

Or manure, or droppings, whichever term you like most.

So today I decided to clean the paddock. Since my horses are at home, we only have a little amount of space and there is no more grass, henceforth the paddock. But my horses they don't do their business in one spot, no all over the place! So I raked it all together and had around seven big piles of sh... You know what. It took me two hours too clean it all!

But after all the raking, I got a reward! Blisters!! Not cool. Each hand has at least three huge blisters and one is open! It kind off hurts but it's ignorable.

The result though, that isn't ignorable, my paddock is spotless! For now at least... I promised myself I will do it more often starting now!

Lots of love!